Monday, 8 August 2016

The Art of Travel Dressing

Hello hello my non-existent readers!

I have been away much to the dismay of a total zero people. Maybe my mum missed me a bit, but that was more likely because I wasn't there to babysit my little brother and sister, not because I wasn't posting more pointless ramblings. 

Anyway, I have been in Europe for a month (just making the most of it before we get officially chucked out for good) and aside from truly finding myself and dabbling with Buddhism, I also learnt a lot about what maketh a good travel outfit. So listen up anyone who is thinking of discovering themselves in thailand/backpacking round Eastern Europe/popping to the shop for a pint of milk. 

Rule Numero Uno (yeah we're going fully exotic here- that's Spanish btw... I think)
Number 1.
The less clothes the better. Yes. Really. Now say it over a few times in your head to really drill in the message. Yeah, you might want to bring your bejewelled beret and fur lined clogs, but you are NOT going to wear them and they will be the first things to be thrown into the nearest lake when you are sobbing and can no longer support the weight of you bag whilst surviving on a packet of super noodles a day. Your mum was right, essentials only. And this isn't only because they will make your bag excruciatingly heavy, but you will basically end up wearing the same two items of clothes in rotation for the full trip anyway.  As well as this, it just makes the packing process easier as well, if you're chucking in your tie dye sarong then why can't you bring your pompom adorned Bardot dress and the rest of the crew? It just gets like Sophie's choice so say no outright and save yourself some heartache later on. Plus, less to take off when you're dancing on a bar in Amsterdam... no? Ok just me then.

Numba Dos. 
Hope you're still listening MIS AMIGOS. Travel with someone who you can share clothes with. And force them to do this even without their consent as this is absolutely essential. You've immediately doubled your wardrobe for the trip without paying all those extra dollar dollar bills when your bag weighs too much at check in. You get so bored of wearing the same clothes over and over whilst away, there was one dark day where I actually shed a tear for my leather jacket hanging alone in my wardrobe back in old Blighty, and this helps break the tedium of wearing your denim shorts for 28 days straight.

Look up the weather. And try to pack accordingly. There's nothing worse than trying to cut your own favourite jeans in to shorts to stop from excessive sweating and chafing because you didn't realise Marrakech was having a hot spell. Or equally fashioning your jumper sleeves into leg warmers because it's 12 degrees in Poland not 30. 

Cuatro Baby.
Bring a cagoule. Are you being sick? Coming out in cold sweats? That's ok, I did too when such a notion was suggested to me by my mother. But there is nothing worse than looking at 18th century churches when your socks are wet and every time you turn your head to admire the architecture you are attacked by a stray drip of water from your own fringe. And when it does start to rain, you feel like the motherf***ing p i m p if you can reach into your bag and produce a waterproof garment. Fact. 
If a cagoule is necessary it might as well be a nice one, and unless you're inclined to get a leopard print one from Primark I suggest a K-Way. Check it out, honest, you might not even be sick when you wear it and catch your reflection in a passing car window.

Image- Tumblr


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